I spend a lot of time alone in a basement, surrounded by rats. Because of my sacharin nature, I have not been able to keep my foolish heart from becoming attached to my furry little experimental subjects. Some experiments that I conduct require me to sit in silence for long periods of time as I […]
-ATLANTA Sydney Glascow and boyfriend Allen Platano recently celebrated their 18 month anniversary. Sydney knew the celebration was going to be special, but she never would have let herself hope for what unfolded. At a dazzling dinner in the city, Allen cleared his throat shared something so deep and special that tears sprang to Sydney’s […]
Let’s be honest ladies – even a PhD isn’t an excuse to look like a sad mushroom in lab. Just because your day is filled with cleaning up rodent poo doesn’t mean your beauty shouldn’t shine forth! I have been working in an animal laboratory for over 10 years now, and I have picked up […]
-ATLANTA Local couple Rebecca and Max have both always loved the holidays, but this year is more special than ever. Over Thanksgiving and the Christmas season, the couple has encountered dozens of extended family members hinting darkly about nuptials. “It’s exhilarating to be grilled about the future of your relationship in front of your entire […]
My 30th birthday is just around the riverbend*, so this Gallowolf would like to cry the wisdom she’s learned to the blue corn moon. Please commit all of these to memory and send me a $30 cashier’s check every time my lil nuggets of wisdom save you from a pickle.** Thank you in advance. Drums, […]
There is a ritual in my home. It is constant as the tides, intricate as the shifting of winds, as majestic and mysterious as Chris Hemsworth’s hair. It is the process of my dog Bear getting on the couch. It begins with the The Look. Sarah McLachan would weep to see Bear in […]
The enneagram – a personality classification scheme that divides people by their basic fears and motivations – has taken the world by storm. People are obsessed. There are posts about which songs you should listen to , which bible character you are (lolz!), how your house looks, which type of person you should choose to […]
-ATLANTA Famous blogger Cgallo, author of Galloblog, is suing her boyfriend for ruining her ability to write long, rambling blog posts about singleness and casual dating. “For over 18 months, my god-awful dating life fueled a multitude of posts that appealed to a niche group of angsty singles,” Cgallo stated in a press release blasted […]
You are shuffling through the grocery store. Bodies surround you. You suspect these bodies must have faces with eyes, eyes that are human, but you don’t care to look. At every turn, you are confronted with an abundance of meaningless choices, choices born of oppressive capitalism. Marketing ploys are yanking at your focus, doing everything […]
We’ve all been there: one day you’re feeling foolishly extroverted and accept a social invitation for an event that will occur a few days later. Then the day comes, and you would literally rather give Bernie Sanders a sponge bath than actually come to this god-awful social event. You then spend the next 87 minutes […]
