-ATLANTA Local couple Rebecca and Max have both always loved the holidays, but this year is more special than ever. Over Thanksgiving and the Christmas season, the couple has encountered dozens of extended family members hinting darkly about nuptials. “It’s exhilarating to be grilled about the future of your relationship in front of your entire […]
Tag: haha
30 nuggets of wisdom for 30 years
My 30th birthday is just around the riverbend*, so this Gallowolf would like to cry the wisdom she’s learned to the blue corn moon. Please commit all of these to memory and send me a $30 cashier’s check every time my lil nuggets of wisdom save you from a pickle.** Thank you in advance. Drums, […]
Nap, Interrupted
There is a ritual in my home. It is constant as the tides, intricate as the shifting of winds, as majestic and mysterious as Chris Hemsworth’s hair. It is the process of my dog Bear getting on the couch. It begins with the The Look. Sarah McLachan would weep to see Bear in […]
How to read Galloblog by Enneagram type
The enneagram – a personality classification scheme that divides people by their basic fears and motivations – has taken the world by storm. People are obsessed. There are posts about which songs you should listen to , which bible character you are (lolz!), how your house looks, which type of person you should choose to […]
Famous blogger sues boyfriend for squelching her creative angst
-ATLANTA Famous blogger Cgallo, author of Galloblog, is suing her boyfriend for ruining her ability to write long, rambling blog posts about singleness and casual dating. “For over 18 months, my god-awful dating life fueled a multitude of posts that appealed to a niche group of angsty singles,” Cgallo stated in a press release blasted […]
Stuffz Gallo Likes: Kroger Woohoo! Deals
You are shuffling through the grocery store. Bodies surround you. You suspect these bodies must have faces with eyes, eyes that are human, but you don’t care to look. At every turn, you are confronted with an abundance of meaningless choices, choices born of oppressive capitalism. Marketing ploys are yanking at your focus, doing everything […]
Excuse generator tool for all your flake needs
We’ve all been there: one day you’re feeling foolishly extroverted and accept a social invitation for an event that will occur a few days later. Then the day comes, and you would literally rather give Bernie Sanders a sponge bath than actually come to this god-awful social event. You then spend the next 87 minutes […]
5 ways to push your coworkers over the edge— that you can try today!
Coworkers: can’t work with them, can’t work without them, amiright?? If you have some little grudgies against one or more of your coworkers, you may be looking for satisfying ways to vent your frustration without getting into a face-to-face kerfuffle that will get you fired. 1. Make sure your personal odor permeates the office That’s […]
Interwebz Slang Guide
Ladies and gents, and those who refuse to categorize themselves in bigendered terms — I recently had to explain to someone — only ~3 years my senior! — the definition of dtr. I was embarrassed for them that they had no idea what I was talking about. Then I polled my Instagram followers, and I […]
Georgia drivers could be ticketed for even thinking about their phones
By: Rebecca Hale Updated: Jul 2, 2018 – 1:07 PM ATLANTA – Even as Georgia drivers are still adjusting to Georgia’s new hand free law, some lawmakers are still not satisfied. Daniel Shapper, spokesperson for Heads UP Georgia, explains. “Although HB673 was a step in the right direction, we now want to get to the root […]