My 30th birthday is just around the riverbend*, so this Gallowolf would like to cry the wisdom she’s learned to the blue corn moon. Please commit all of these to memory and send me a $30 cashier’s check every time my lil nuggets of wisdom save you from a pickle.** Thank you in advance.
- You don’t have to date everyone who’s a good person
- Be okay with uncertainty in relationships
- Don’t try to engineer and control any relationship, especially romantic
- People don’t owe you affection or attention when you do something nice for them
- Talk to your Grandma like a peer and be ridiculous with your nieces and nephews
- Allow yourself to feel your feels
- Don’t let your feels control you
- You’re responsible for your own feelings, but be aware of how you are prone to feel after spending time with any person
- Spend time with people who make you feel good
- You can forgive people but still protect yourself from bad characters
- Most people are schmucky schmuckersons
- Celebrate and hold onto the people that aren’t schmucky schmuckersons
- People who bring exciting drama into your life are also likely to bring a bunch of hurt into your life.
- Go to the arts for your dramatic fix
- Finding things to laugh at is serious business
- The expensive car is *not* worth it
- Eating more expensive healthy food *is* worth it
- Neglecting your health is not financial prudence– it’s a great strategy to make all your borderline acute health issues full blown chronic health issues
- Try to find joy in challenges instead of focusing on the stress
- Stop feeling sorry for yourself
- You can be mature and intelligent and still wildly silly
- It’s not necessary or wise to trust everyone in a Christian community
- Allow yourself to dwell on and obsess about how beautiful something is
- Weighted blankets are heavenly
- It’s worth the AC cost to turn down the temp enough to not sweat at night
- Allow yourself to consider you are wrong about everything
- Don’t let uncertainty paralyze you
- You don’t have to listen to everyone’s advice, even if they’re great people
- God is bigger and more confusing than you ever imagined
— EDITORIAL NOTES —
*By “just around” I mean in like 2 months. But that’s none of your business!
**Although if a Trader Joe’s kosher dill pickle was after me, I would say “take me now” and swoon at its delicious foot.