The Profound Mystery of the Honk du Homme

honk

This afternoon I was walking from the grocery store toward my lab, and a man driving a garbage truck honked at me.

As soon as I heard those two endearing “beep beeps!” I dropped my $12 Greek yogurt on the ground, kicked off my flippity flops, and sprinted to catch up with his garbage truck. Unfortunately the truck continued to move, so in heady desperation I yelled out my name, cell phone number, and the best times to reach me. He called me a few minutes ago, and we have dinner plans later this week!

.. NOT! I looked around in bewilderment until I spotted the instigator who put the lives of his fellow waste disposal expert’s in danger by leaning his head out the window for a 360 view. After grinning at me with smug self-satisfaction, he just up ‘n drove away into the distance. Now our lives are forever separated in time and place.

Dear #galloblog readers: do any of you know the rationale behind horn-tooting at [attractive?] women? I have so many questions.

  • What do these enthusiastic honkers hope to gain from these interactions? Was the exhilarating exchange I detailed above a success in his mind?
  • Do men wish women would honk their horns at them? Is this a practice I should implement in my own life? #gallohonk?
  • Do honking men honk their horn at everything that excites them? Like, would they honk at a Krystal* lying on the side of the road?

If any of you have information on any of this, I would really like to gain insight on this fascinating phenomenon.

— Editorial Notes —

*I’m not trying to be a snob, but for some reason I just have a feeling that men who honk at women shuffling down the road in yoga pants also eat at Krystal. But all of this is very new, so I’m open to push-back on this.

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