A tearful plea to all men

MEN! Hear one, hear all!

I don’t care if you are black, brown, white, or yellow!

I don’t care if you are straight, gay, bi-sexual, or have a special affinity for Keebler elves!

I don’t care if you have the body of a god or the body of a gramps!

I don’t care if your skin is silky smooth or if you have an unruly forest of hair on your tum!

This plea is to all of you heterogametics.

DO NOT WEAR CROP TOPS … EVER.

A picture is worth a thousand words, so here’s 3,000 words worth of why —

Screenshot_2017-10-05-12-12-19
[EXPLICIT!!!!!] (public instagram post)
Screenshot_2017-10-05-12-19-31 (1)
If you haven’t already decided to boycott the NFL, this should seal it. (public instagram post)
Screenshot_2017-10-05-12-18-33
I have never been more proud that someone is *not* American. (public instagram post)

SIRS, I BEG OF YOU — CEASE AND DESIST.

Please and thank you.

Click here for more timeless fashion advice!